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Local Business  » Good Fences Make Good Neighbors in Business and Life

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors in Business and Life

Copyright 2005 Anne Alexander

If you say "yes" to most things that come your way, you may be a

nice person, but you're probably not a very happy one.

Establishing good boundaries is a big challenge for many people.

And it is an essential time management skill for creating a

successful professional life.

Here are a couple of key tools for establishing healthy and

effective boundaries:

- Set specific periods of every day when you take calls and

answer email. Don't become a slave to email, the phone or IM.

- Learn how to say "no¨ in a socially acceptable way. Use a

neutral tone of voice, not overly excited or defensive and not

in a depressed, eeyore-like way.

For example, if you're asked to serve on another board or

committee, you might say something like this: "I love what your

organization does, but I've made a commitment to spend more time

with my kids, so I can't take on anything more right now. But

thanks for asking.¨

- Get your boss to set up regular meeting times with you to

discuss important issues. Waiting around for answers you need

about a project is a time termite - an activity that eats up

your time and your life.

Here's a golden time management tip nugget: We teach people how

to treat us. If you are constantly interrupted by email or

instant messaging, for example, if you always respond

immediately, you are training the senders that you will always

be available, instantly. In some situations that can be handy,

but most of the time, it is just a huge time termite that you

must learn to control or it will eat you alive.

This is the same with the infamous "open door" policy. While it

is excellent management to be available to your staff and/or

co-workers on a regular basis, it is insane to be available 8

hours a day (or 10 hours, or, God forbid, "24/7" one of the

worst concepts ever created). Teach and train your staff (and

your boss, if you have one!) when you are unavailable for visits

or interruptions (barring true emergencies) for critical project

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time.

Question: If you jump every time someone calls, emails, IMs,

pops their head in your door or otherwise initiates contact with

you, what does that make you? Answer: a jumping bean. Not a

human being. So which are you?

Consider this article to be an official coach permission slip to

erect strong, healthy boundaries - a good, solid fence. As

Robert Frost said, Good fences make good neighbors. If it makes

it easier to blame your change of behavior on someone else, just

tell them your coach (that would be me) told you that you had to

do it! Remember, good boundaries will help you take back your

life.

About the author:

Ready to be a power professional? Get business coach Anne

Alexander's free 8 part e-course "Maximize Your Professional

Success," at

http://www.authentic-alternatives.com/maximizenow.htm .Warning!

For real people only. No fakers, please.